Have you ever thought about the past? I have really been thinking about my school years lately. Grade school, junior high, high school, friendships, first crushes...
Do you ever wonder what happened to someone? Who impacted you...good or bad? What teachers do you remember?
It's funny what we remember and how different someone else remembers the exact same thing. I remember being stabbed in the leg with a pencil in fourth grade because I wouldn't let a boy (I had a crush on) cheat off of my science paper. I remember the teacher grabbing the boy by the ears and putting him inside of a big garbage can. Back then it was acceptable...now the boy would have been suspended and the teacher may have been fired. How times have changed!
I remember being afraid all the time, being afraid no one liked me, being afraid of being teased all the time, being afraid to ride the bus. I would have rather walked across town than ride the bus. I look back and now realize that it was more likely my home life that was making afraid of everything. It's funny to look back and remember a girl who always picked on me. She stood behind me in choir and always poked at me. She actually tore a hole in one of sweaters. I remember crying about it and then being teased more. What she didn't know was that we couldn't afford new clothing and this was the first new sweater I had in years...my grandmother had bought it for me. She didn't know that my home life included emotional, mental and physical abuse and that by coming home with that torn sweater, I was going to be beat. I didn't learn until later in life that she too came from an abusive home. The only difference was she came from a wealthy abusive home and I came from a very poor abusive home.
This revelation so to speak was a major changing point in my life. As a child growing up, we all had insecurities! Those insecurities play on what we do and who we are, and they come from our home life. What we don't know is what the other person's home life is like.
Just about everyone knew that my father was the town drunk! What they probably didn't know was he was a very abusive drunk. They didn't know that I would rather be anywhere than at home. I loved staying overnight with others but I was always worried about leaving my little sister at home...alone...so I rarely stayed overnight anywhere. If I did get permission to stay somewhere, I was always in trouble the next day.
I was so jealous of everyone else's life. I never really thought that anyone could have it as bad as I did. Looking back, I know some of them did.
I was at a Bible retreat a few weekends ago and one of the speakers was talking about looking the best you can. She was beautiful...long,thick beautiful blonde hair, very petite, beautiful blue eyes...she was talking about Colossians 3 and how to clothe yourself...for you and for the Lord. Very interesting study. She was great at what she did. But the one thing I remember the most is what she told us at the end of her study. She told us what we were all thinking...how could someone so beautiful have any of the problems we had. She could fit into all the nice clothing, she didn't have to do anything with her hair it was naturally wavy and beautiful...what we didn't know was that she was born with her insides on the outside! Her stomach was nothing but scars. She needed to live in a certain city because that was were her specialist was and when she got constipated, they had to surgically remove it...all the time!
We never know what is going on in the life's of others. They may come from a wealthy family but still have problems...maybe even worse than your own. Don't judge people to quickly...you don't know the whole story! And don't be envious of others...there problems may be worse than yours! You just never know!
